Holiday Traditions!

Without our traditions, our lives would be as shaky as... as... as a Fiddler on the Roof!

What traditions will your kids remember next year, in 20 years, for a lifetime? Will he remember the piles of presents, or that Grammy and Grandfather took all the grandkids to the theater every holiday? Will she recall that "perfect gift" you bought for her when she was 3, or 10, or 16, or will she remember the year Daddy's gingerbread house was a train station with the town clock on top (it's always 5 o'clock somewhere!), or the year she created a wonderland gingerbread castle that looked a little like Hogwarts, in red and black on a shimmering lake of silver nonpareils?

Traditions create memories.

What are your holiday traditions?

Ours are simple. Every year, on the Saturday before Christmas, Grammy and Grandfather take all the grandchildren to the matinee of the Holiday Panto at our local theater. Each year, the kids search excitedly to see what this year's Panto will be, and what role their favorite actor will play. They have to see Mark Lazar!

Then when they return, we have the family traditional dinner in the oven: Hot Cheese Monkey. One of the kids is sent down to the "dungeon" to catch the Monkey, and we all enjoy this traditional egg, cheese, bread and sausage or ham casserole, served with cooked and raw carrots for the veggie, and pickles on the side, because... well, because it's a tradition, this one passed down from my husband's grandmother, Gran. For some reason, no one seems to need dessert.

And we decorate gingerbread houses. This tradition is old enough to have taken on a life of it's own. The extended family, and now boyfriends and girlfriends, all join us for gingerbread houses, each with his own house and her own theme. And each year their Dad creates his "secret" project. No one knows what it will be until he's done. Grandfather helps the little ones, while Grammy creates amazing snowmen and other hand-built decorations for whoever wants them. As the kids are growing up, sometimes she even decorates her own house!

We collect the decorations for weeks beforehand. There are always graham crackers for constructing add-on porch roofs or school bell towers, ice cream cones for church steeples, and Necco wafers, Christmas colored nonpareils or frosted shredded wheat for roofing materials. There are gummy lifesavers to turn into wreathes, and licorice allsorts that become stepping stones or window candles, roofing materials or presents under Peeps Christmas trees.

And then there are this year's unique candy finds, those special decorations that we've never seen before. These new decorations delight and inspire! A few years ago, it was chocolate "rocks." They turned into a rocky hillside a garden path, and a rock garden for the turtle. No one knows what new surprises are in store for this year!

One year, we had a Jewish gingerbread house and a Muslim gingerbread house. The kids researched to be certain to provide thoughtful decorations, and they learned about different cultures in the process. Gingerbread as social studies!

Another year, we had a spring house with beautiful spring flowers, a lake and a garden path. And another saw a Halloween masterpiece. One year was a "foil" theme - kisses wrapped in various colored foils were stripped and the foil used to roof and decorate. Last year included an attached garage with a lift-opening door and a candy car stowed inside, at the end of the gingerbread house's driveway. I'm told a black-and-white theme might be featured on one house this year; I can't wait to see it!

Like most traditions, this one isn't quite so simple. We collect candies for months before, making certain we have fruit-striped gum and gummy bears to become sleds and their passengers, holiday M&Ms, and plenty of coconut and mini marshmallows, so everyone can have their "snow of choice."

The gingerbread must be made in advance, and even that's another fun family tradition. We've discovered new gingerbread house molds over the years, including last year's coup thanks to a new boyfriend: a gingerbread train mold! eBay is our friend, for buying out-of-print gingerbread molds. We've mastered forming the dough and then peeling it out onto baking trays to speed the process, but baking 12+ houses is still a two-day adventure. We have egg-white powder to make Royal Icing, and we assemble all the houses at least a day in advance of decorating. We learned the hard way that Rome was not built in a day, and Royal Icing needs a day to set firm!

It's worth every minute of the prep to watch our kids and their cousins, and parents, too, sitting around the tables, passing candies back and forth, sharing ideas and keeping secrets until the big "reveal," and making tons of great memories.

And year after year, the question is always the same... not when will we shop, or what am I getting, but what day is the Panto and Gingerbread Houses?

Traditions!

If you still need a little something to wrap, visit Hoagies' Gifted: Smart Toys and Games. You'll find tons of toys and games for gifted kids and families, all reviewed by gifted kids for gifted kids. These are the toys and games that last more than one day or even one play, bringing years of joy, without driving gifted parents completely batty.

Click Next Blog to continue to the next blog in this month's loop, all featuring wonderful ideas for holiday "giving"... Let's say Bye-Bye to Buy-Buy this holiday season, and make memories our kids will remember for a lifetime!

This blog is part of Hoagies' Gifted Blog Hop on Holiday Gifts: Bye-Bye to Buy-Buy. Click here to visit the Blog Hop page, and find all the blogs PLUS a bonus Pinterest Link! And from here, you can visit all the great past Blog Hops, including Gifted Advocacy, Gifted Friendships, The "G" Word, and lots more...

You are not alone! Finding gifted community

In last week's Hoagies' Gifted Blog Hop: Gifted Friendships I shared the research on the importance of gifted friendships in Gifted Friendships: You Are Not Alone!. This week, I'll help you find community!

One of the earliest things gifted parents discover is the sense that they are alone. If you're not in a gifted community, you learn quickly that while other parents can share and brag about their kids developmental, sports, and even academic accomplishments, gifted parents may NOT. For other parents, it's just normal, everyday parent conversation, but for us... so many parents think we're bragging, or worse, just making it up. We learn early that everyone can share about their kids... except us.

We are alone.

If parents lucky enough to land in a gifted community early and often, we may be lucky enough to have a place to share about our gifted kids, too. But even there, there are things we can't talk about. Have a kid who's not as perfect as the rest of the kids in the very gifted community? Better not talk about it, or we may be "blamed" for somehow causing their uniqueness. Or worse, we fear we'll be drummed out of the community, the one place where we feel comfortable sharing all the great things our child is doing.

We are alone, even in our own crowd.

The most important thing that gifted parents need to know, and be reminded of early and often, is that you are not alone! Got a gifted kid? There are many of us out here just like you! Live in a rural area, where it seems none of us are nearby? We might not live next door, but we are in equally rural (or urban, or suburban) communities, feeling similar isolation. Have an exceptionally or profoundly gifted child who is still far different from the "pleasantly" gifted child, a child for whom the normal gifted program is like giving individuals blades of grass to a hungry dinosaur... it's good, but not enough for the dinosaur to know you're feeding it. You are still not alone, even if you feel alone in the local gifted parents group. Or you have a wildly diverse gifted child, who is extraordinary good at some things, but extraordinarily weak at others? You, most of all, are not alone. Even if there is no other child exactly like yours (and there likely is someone, somewhere), there are many other parents struggling with Twice Exceptional (2e, dually identified) kids like yours.

Gifted community is the lifeline for all of us. It's the place we can talk about parenting these wonderful kids. We can share the struggles of education, or the resources of homeschooling. We can commiserate on the lack of programs at early ages, and create our own programs with our critical mass and our unswerving need. We can find a place to brag and to beg, to share the past and consider the future. But how can we find these amazing, amusing, accepting gifted communities?

There are public and private, open and closed communities. We share on Facebook and mailing lists, blogs and boards, behind firewalls and in real life. We meet at formal conferences and casual gatherings across the country and around the world. No matter who or where you are, you are not alone!

Electronic communities are a great way to get started. For open communities with tons of participants, sure to be folks who live near you, start with the major mailing list communities. TAGFAM and GT-Families offer mailing lists for general gifted topics for families and teachers, on lists of the same names. If you're homeschooling your gifted kids, TAGMAX is the list for you, with nearly a thousand other subscribers who share resources and ideas for homeschooling, unschooling, deschooling and more. GT-Special is the list for parents of those tricky-to-parent, challenging-to-educate twice exceptional (or 2e) kids. And TAGPDQ is the community for you if you're the parent of a "more than just plain gifted" child, those exceptionally and profoundly gifted kids who often require more extreme educational options.

Visit Hoagies' Gifted Online Communities: Mailing Lists for subscription instructions and links for these plus hundreds of other more specialized mailing lists, organized by population, country, state, and district or locality. There is a mailing list for everyone!

Looking for a casual community you can just "drop into" when you need a little support? Though they are more public, check out any one of the great Facebook communities for gifted: Hoagies' Gifted Education Page, SENG (Supporting Emotional Needs of the Gifted), and Gifted Homeschoolers Forum are three popular Facebook gifted forums. And there are plenty more. Just search for Gifted and your other interests (your town, your school district, homeschool, etc.) on Facebook.

Looking for something less electronic and more real-life? Check out the U.S. and International organizations listed in Hoagies' Gifted: Organizations. Many offer conferences, summer programs, meetings and more!

If you have testing and your kids qualify, one of the best U.S. gifted communities is the Davidson Young Scholars program. It costs nothing to join, and offers a wide slate of support options, including electronic and real-lie gatherings. Even if you use nothing else in the program, be sure to join your local DIG mailing list, and attend some of the DIGs (Davidson Informal Gatherings) to meet and enjoy others in the Davidson gifted community!

Whatever means you choose, be sure to explore the online and real-life gifted communities so that both you and your kids learn that You are NOT alone!
 

Don't miss the rest of last week's Gifted Friendship Blog Hop. With nearly two dozen blogs on gifted kids, teens, young adults and adults, plus a couple blogs on the value of "invisible friends," there's something for everyone!

Go out and play. Go Geocaching!

Growing up in the 60s and 70s, we kids heard that all the time. "Go out and play! Get out of my hair." We spent hours and days exploring the woods behind the house, wandering through the neighborhood "bridle trail," and exploring nearby fields. We climbed trees, and looked out over the neighbor's roof... that was scary! We spent hours hanging out on friends' jungle gyms, riding bikes, and checking out wildflowers up and down the road.

It's not my imagination... kids have much less roaming range these days. Research bears out my recollection: over 4 generations, the range of an 8-year-old has shrunken from 6 miles to 300 yards from the front door. Read How Children Lost the Right to Roam in Four Generations, the source of this frightening picture.

Nature is good for us.
Besides the rights and responsibilities of growing up, what else have our kids lost in this cultural change? Lots. Research tells us that unstructured time in nature has huge benefits for kids. Study after study shows that kids are losing out. As preschoolers, kids are already less active than is recommended, and obesity is more common. By school-age, kids are unable to identify common plants, and are more myopic from the decrease in the amount of long-distance focus that children's eyes used to get outside in nature. Free-play and contact with nature is declining dramatically. Children’s Nature Deficit: What We Know – and Don’t Know details 45 studies on these factors and more.

So what, you ask? Research shows that nature is good for us. Mental health benefits include stress and anxiety reduction, ADHD symptom reduction, and improved focus and cognitive function. Yes, we think and feel better on nature! The physical benefits of free-play in nature are just as impressive: better vascular health, less vitamin D deficiency, lower BMI (body mass index), better physical fitness, less childhood asthma, and less myopia. Healthy Benefits to Children form Contact with the Outdoors & Nature summarizes dozens more studies on these benefits.

But how do I get my kids outside into Nature?
That is the question. Screen time is addictive. Kids are learning loads and enjoying computer games, social networking and more. How do we get them to put down their devices and go outside? It's simple: we don't. Instead, let them use their devices outside!

The answer: Geocaching
Here's a game that's nerdy enough to appeal to gifted kids of all ages. Start on your computer or other device. Look up geocaches near you. Then use a GPSr or your smartphone with an app to track down the caches, using the latitude/longitude (lat/long) and some clues about the size and difficulty of the cache. When you find it, sign the paper log inside, and log your find on your device.

What are these geocaches? Caches can be many things. A cache may be half-mini-marshmallow-size magnetic "nano" attached to a park bench, or an ammo can or large plastic container hidden in the woods, or even bigger. Larger geocaches usually contain "swag," fun little toys for our youngest cachers. Caches may take you to a park you never knew existed, or a historical place that you've been passing by all your life. Caches may take you for a long hike in the woods, or might first have you solve a complex puzzle at home before you can discover the latitude and longitude of your search. They may lead you to events, where other geocachers of all ages get together to have a picnic, or to clean up a park in a CITO (Cache In, Trash Out) event. There are different caches for all different types of cachers!

And where are all these geocaches hiding? Everywhere around you! There are caches in urban, suburban and rural areas of every continent on Earth, plus one on the International Space Station. Caches on terrains rated 1 are handicapped accessible. Terrains 1.5 and 2 are stroller accessible - even the youngest kids can handle these caches. A terrain 3 cache might be a little ways up an easy-to-climb tree or a steep hill. You might want to wait until the kids are a little older before trying to find caches rated higher than 3, but don't rule them out. I've found a terrain 5 geocache - specialized equipment required - by borrowing a paddle boat from a local picnic park to cross the river to the cache. Tons of family fun!

Geocachers love a challenge, and geocaching is full of personal challenges. Can you find a cache with a difficulty/terrain (D/T) rating of 5/5, where 5 terrain means "specialized equipment required?" Can you find caches in every state you travel to, or every county within your state? We cheated on this challenge: the first state we've cached every county is in the nearby state of Delaware... it only has three counties.

Can you find a cache of every possible difficulty and terrain combination? There are 81 different D/T combinations to find, and we're not there yet. Can you geocache for 13 days with different totals found each day? Cache for 90 straight days? Or 366 days? And there are lots of other challenges! For gifted kids (and adults) who love graphs and charts and statistics, geocaching offers tons...

Get Started Geocaching!
With over 2.4 million active geocaches around the world, there are bound to be a few near you. To find your first, you need to sign up on Geocaching.com and set up your free account. Then click on Play, Hide and Seek a Cache, and type in your address. Pick a geocache from the local list (it's best to start with a low difficulty cache that's been found recently), then go out and find it! You'll find caches near home, school, work, and everywhere you travel. Geocaching is a great way to find your way around a new city, or find hidden treasures near your home.

For pointers on getting started, read Hoagies' Gifted | Geocaching 101: Finding Your First Geocache. Some of my favorite geocaches are Puzzle Caches. Puzzle Caches may be site puzzles, where you go to the location and explore, seeking answers to specific questions and using those answers to find the lat/long of the cache. Or they can be more complicated puzzles, from visual puzzles to ciphers to any kind of puzzle that a cache owner can think of... some as complex as ARML math problems, and some as simple as finding the text hidden on the cache page. Read Geocaching 103: Solving Puzzle Caches for lots more on both solving and creating your own Puzzle Caches.

Geocaching encourages out-of-the-box creativity. Who creates all these caches? Geocachers do! Once you've found 40 or 50 caches, and have an idea what you're looking for and what good cache locations might be near you, consider hiding your own cache. The instructions on Geocaching.com walk you through the steps. Finding caches is fun; creating your own cache container, theme and/or puzzle to make a unique hide of your own is even more interesting! Read Geocaching 104: Creating and Placing Your Own Geocache for more ideas.

Geocaching with a group
Both Girl Scouts and Boy Scouts offer Geocaching badges, with plenty of adventure.

Go out and play. Go out and geocache! The kind of play that gifted kids and adults love!

Photographs taken at Crouching Chief, Hidden Cache geocache in Wissahickon Park, Philadelphia.